Friday, April 4, 2008

Peace through tears (Fall 2007)

I decided that since I was going to out partying and dancing and socializing on Saturday night with my sisters in the Columbus area where I would go a different route on the Friday night before but one I am sure many genetic girls like to experience as well on occasion. First of all I did get to meet some new sisters on Saturday in Columbus including two girls who came out for the first time and one who had only been out twice before as well as some girls who apparently live in the area I grew up in many years ago. It is sometimes very true that is a small world and life does come in cycles sometimes. I also got to meet a person I had only known online who had undergone a tragic incident in her which caused a medical and emotional toll on her along with her transition. I was glad she agreed to come along if I drove her and to welcome her back to our active community.

Friday night I took a softer girl approach which was quite fun but I had not done it in quite a while. I relaxed at a cabin I had rented for the weekend and the first thing I did was pour myself a glass of wine and slip into my bathing suit ( one piece with little skirt and full of flowers ) and get in the hot tub where I let the bubbles and jets pound my stressed and tired body. Ahhhhhh- did that feel so good. It gave me time to think as I starred at the beautiful clear sky lit up by stars white soft clouds and the moon. Where am I to go in my life and how do I get there? Some tough questions for sure but my friends they were much easier with the sound of a mountain stream running in the background, good wine to sip on and the warmth of a the bubbly hot tub to aid me in my thought process.

After contemplating my course and direction in life and how I am going to get there I decided I need another treat. So I slipped out of my bathing suit and toweled off and put a fresh coat on my nails. I slipped into my comfy girl pink pajamas and my slippers and poured myself some more wine and curled up on the couch and watched not one but two romantic movies (commonly called “chick flicks”) I cried at the sad parts and cried again when the happy romantic loved filled endings occurred. I just cried and sobbed but I felt so good like it help get some things out in the fresh air of the night. I slept so soundly that night in my comfy bed and pink pillows and slept in for a while the next morning. I awoke so refreshed and felt so alive …. Melissa is bursting through and I have never felt more at peace although I know my journey will not be easy at all. It is truly wonderful to be a girl and be transgendered. I know there is pain to come but I will cry my tears and feel refreshed and move on in my journey.

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